DON’T JUST APPRECIATE… ACKNOWLEDGE!
When was the last time you really acknowledged someone? I’m not talking about saying “thank you” – even if it was a very BIG thank you. And I’m not talking about offering your appreciation or even giving up some praise. All of those things are very nice, for sure… Acknowledging someone, truly and fully acknowledging them, is not about a quick “you rock”, a pat on the back or a nod and smile. It’s not even complementing them on how they look or what they did. Acknowledging is beyond praise… more than a confirming nod or appreciating. It’s bigger than any of those things.
When you fully and generously acknowledge someone, you see them for who they are, express gratitude for the difference they make in the world… and recognize aloud that they matter. You hear them. You see them. You ‘get’ them. And you tell them what you see!
Acknowledgement is a glorious expression of gratitude that actually makes the receiver’s life bigger by identifying – out loud – the difference he or she makes in the world and creating a picture for them of what’s possible for the future… just because he or she exists! That’s huge.
And, joyfully, you, the acknowledger stands to win here, too. When we get beyond our fears of scarcity (where giving anything may mean none left for us), and our human penchant to give either credit or avoid blame (that whole deal where in order for someone to be ‘right’, someone else must be wrong), we stand in true gratitude and it’s an awesome place to stand! Studies actually show a high correlation between giving acknowledgement and our physical and emotional health. When we let someone know how their very existence creates a future worth living into… we get to step into that future with them! How cool is that.
You have to listen. You have to be present. No judging. That’s what it takes to see whom they are, the contribution that they are – and that they make; and to see how much it truly matters. When you see that and you acknowledge it, BAM!!! The fireworks go off in head and heart. And then, my friends, we have only to express what we see… to describe those explosions. NOTE: This may take practice just like any other wonderful skill you seek to master. It’s worth the ‘work’, promise!
Ready for a practical, real-life example? Thought so…
These are typical Compliments/Praise/Appreciation:
- You look awesome tonight.
2. Thanks for inviting me to dinner tonight.
3. Hey, good job on the teleseminar.
And now these are truly GENEROUS Acknowledgments:
- You have a flair for color and style that lights you up and pulls others in!
- Being with you for dinner is like going to a party. You make everything fun and interesting. I feel so happy.
- What an inspiration you were on the teleseminar tonight. You speak with such conviction and passion. I can’t stop thinking about it.
Yes, it is a fine distinction between appreciation and acknowledgment, but, WOWSERS, can that little distinction rock someone’s world. It says, “ I see what you did AND, even more important, I see who you are and I see: that, why and how much… you matter.”
Gift with purchase: When you train yourself to see the magic in others you are simultaneously training yourself to see it in everything… including yourself!