generous giving Archives - What Do I Say? What Do I Do?

SHIPPING & RECEIVING

A MESSAGE FROM THE MANAGER OF THE SHIPPING & RECEIVING DEPT.

Even in business it’s called SHIPPING & RECEIVING… not SHIPPING &TAKING. And, although the ‘shipping’, or what I refer to as Generous Giving, may be effortless, fun and easy for you – Generous Receiving may not come quite as naturally. It’s doubtful that any of us grew up without hearing, “It’s better to give than to receive.” So, thank you world, I heard it, I believed it and I lived it… I gave easily (still do) and I took. I had to learn how to receive. Now, as self-appointed head of the shipping and receiving department, I invite you to share what I’ve discovered about GENEROUS RECEIVING.

In the past, the generous ones were the good guys (I wanted that moniker), and the ‘takers’ (said with a frown of distain) were, by majority decision, the ones whose mothers never taught them good manners. “She’s such a taker” was, indeed, a label that no one wanted to wear. Takers were greedy, self-centered and maybe even needy. It was never really fun to give them anything – not gifts, time, compliments or love, because they seemed to feel that it was their ‘due’; that the world owed it to them and I was just the delivery girl. If I gave them a little they were quick to expect and frequently ask for even more…

My view of the value of takers hasn’t changed much over the years. And, don’t kid yourself; those self-serving folks still live among us! You can recognize them by their inability to receive anything without acting as if it were their birthright. They literally TAKE instead of RECEIVE!

Get that? It’s a great distinction. To “RECEIVE” implies that something is being presented, extended or offered; to “TAKE” means to remove, subtract or (here’s my favorite dictionary definition) “to dispossess someone of something”! Ouch!

And then, hallelujah, there are those who actually get it… the generous receivers of our planet.

They understand (completely and on every level) that the ‘true gift’ is graciously and generously receiving that which you are given. It’s cyclical; the gift of giving begets the gift of receiving which begets the gift of giving (sincere appreciation and gratitude) which begets… you be-getting it, don’t you?

When we see the ‘gift behind the gift’; the love, the thoughtfulness, the sacrifice and the generosity, and are moved into ACTION, we are generously receiving. In recognizing those things we are moved to GRATITUDE and are GRATEFUL – not just for the actual gift itself, but for the giving of it and the giver. It’s that awesome awareness that compels the Generous Receiver to say “thank-you”, and do it in a way that has the giver be fully and perfectly acknowledged. That my friends, is the true gift, RECEIVING what’s been SHIPPED and handling the ACCOUNTS PAYABLE!

To Give or Not To Give? HOW is the Question!

Look around. There’s a lot of giving going on. Sometimes we humans ‘give of ourselves, ‘give a piece of our mind’, ‘give a spanking’ or ‘give trouble’. Other times we ‘give a hoot’, ‘give a damn’, ‘give birth’ or ‘give in’. Then there are the times we ‘give up’, ‘give orders’, ‘give away’ or ‘give someone a leg up’. And how about you? When you give… just what do you give? And, even more important, how do you give it?

Let’s assume you give gifts and compliments. You do, don’t you? The question is, HOW do you give?

Are you a generous giver? Are you sure? Truth is, while giving is not uncommon, generous giving actually is. “Have a nice day”, “Lookin’ good!”, or “Thank you K-Mart shoppers”, while technically gifts, are of indistinct value and infrequently extended from the heart. Those ‘free’ gifts you get at the bank or the car wash – or the food they ‘give away’ as you meander through Costco, are all on par with the bag of gifty goodies that you assault as you walk through the rows of exhibits at a convention or fair. Did you ever get a gift of shoe covers as you entered a model home, or sipped a cup of coffee or nibbled on a free cookie as you waited for your accountant, doctor or lawyer? Self-serving, yet, they are gifts… They are given with an agenda; perhaps to put you in a good mood or maybe to create a sense of obligation for you to ‘give’ something in return – like business.

Then there is the more personal side – folks who hand out ‘treats’ on Halloween, and those who wrap way too many holiday gifts for people they feel ‘obligated’ to award. You know the situation… you give, but you do it reluctantly, begrudgingly or offhandedly; certainly without joy.

A gift given generously is offered as a contribution (as in gift, not donation). It is something you do because you want to, not because you have to. There’s no hidden agenda, no ‘in-order-to’ plan and it’s all about them and making them happy. There’s nothing in it for you… although, SURPRISE! The return on your investment is often huge.

I now offer you the lyrics of one of my favorite kid-songs, Magic Penny by Malvina Reynolds (circa 1949 -my birth year). My gift to you…

Magic Penny

Love is something if you give it away,
Give it away, give it away.
Love is something if you give it away,
You end up having more.

It’s just like a magic penny,
Hold it tight and you won’t have any.
Lend it, spend it, and you’ll have so many
They’ll roll all over the floor.

For love is something if you give it away,
Give it away, give it away.
Love is something if you give it away,
You end up having more.

Money’s dandy and we like to use it,¹
But love is better if you don’t refuse it.
It’s a treasure and you’ll never lose it
Unless you lock up your door.

For love is something if you give it away,
Give it away, give it away.
Love is something if you give it away,
You end up having more.

So let’s go dancing till the break of day,
And if there’s a piper, we can pay.
For love is something if you give it away,
You end up having more.

For love is something if you give it away,
Give it away, give it away.
Love is something if you give it away,
You end up having more.